I like to say I always look at the glass half full, but that’s not true. I’m human, in case you couldn’t tell, and sometimes I not only don’t see my glass half full…I see it full of crap. Okay, so this is not your normal post from me, and you may start to see a different side of me that only my closest friends get a glimpse of, but don’t worry it’s not like a horror show or anything, but it may make you run!
Let’s start at the beginning shall we? Seven years ago, on top of a mountain (I know many of you have heard this story, just bear with me) I got the calling that women around the world needed saving, and I was just the woman to do it! So, from 9100ft, I leaped into the air with my nude colored stockings, my tight read undies, my gold belt and red cape with a big ole’ ass “S” on my chest and sang…”Here I come to save the day!!!!” Oh, wait that’s the theme from Underdog, wrong cartoon but sometimes I still feel like a dog. I lick my wounds, show my pitiful face search for the next meal. Do you know the feeling? We jump into the air, thinking we’re going to do great things in our life and what we find out is our ideal image of the perfect business is overcome with “stuff” because we keep piling more and more onto the “big picture” hoping something will help our vision take root. But it doesn’t, it just gets muddled and confused. This is why I am here today. To rip off the “S”, drop my drawers and show you that underneath it all, I’m just a mom wanting to leave a lasting impression in the hearts and mind of the world. I’m just a woman who doesn’t want to be invisible. I’m just a human being who wants to be happy. Now, can you relate.
It took some time for me to see this “aha” but it wasn’t because I never saw it, I was just too busy filling my cup with other stuff to truly own it. It was time to go back to the seed that was planted over seven years ago and clear out those things that no longer serve my place on earth. Here is another one, but of course I could write a one act play on many more if I really wanted to….but maybe another day, but not now. Today it’s about simplicity.
Letting go of “Being IT For Someone Else”
I have been hosting TV shows for twenty years out of the South Florida market. Most of these shows were consumer based programs, but only a few really added any great value to the world. I sang for my supper, performed the way THEY wanted and brought a lot of talent and skill to the set. I was always working. I loved that part of my life, but today I made a decision that wasn’t really that difficult. I was the main host for a great show which aired on Lifetime and WE. When I took the job I was building my personal business and felt it was a great win/win. They got my talent, I got national exposure. It was perfect, but it has run its course. I found out that I was placed as a “periodic co-host” without being told. This bothered me for two reasons: 1) I was not given any knowledge of the change. I found out through their Facebook banner where my name and face was GONE and 2) It was my show first and I am excellent at what I do (YUP that’s called ego) Then, after a very short time and deep reflection I realized, it is no longer a win/win. They don’t value me in the same way anymore, therefore why should I continue to “hold on”. I had a decision to make, stay the course and “perform” when they ask me to, or…Speak UP and Speak Out and take the first step. I chose to practice what I preach! I released THEM from our commitment to each other. It felt great to FINALLY be the one to end something that doesn’t create a mutually beneficial relationship. There are many roads I see my vision traveling through and I knew I had to close a door so the light can stream through a new one, but even brighter.
“By closing a door, you concentrate the light and focus through another opening which provides a more fulfilling journey.” ~ Suzanne Kovi
There are more door closings coming soon, not sure which ones. Perhaps it will be old patterns and beliefs, not sure. I know when the time comes the door will close with ease because it will be the right time. What are you willing to release so YOU can allow you light to become stronger?